::*~Wint3rDreamz~*:: - Enigma of a thousand flowers

Monday, December 15, 2008

my hesitant attitude causes trouble.
every now and then

if i would have been more firm about helping out with the pistol team, perhaps he wun even have the chance to come into the picture.

"...n eh i duno if it's nice for them to stop him from going down since they hav alrdy accepted his offer.."
"...n nt tt i want him to coach, just tt i dun want to make empty promises, get him out but in e end unable to commit to them n den they'll be left w no one..im nt sure if i'll be able to look aft them if i get a job..i really dunno"

2 msgs i have sent to e.dad regarding the issue. such a weakling arent i.

i wun say im more capable than v.lee. but at least im sure i'll be more driven to ensure that they do well, being part of team nj and senior of these lovely juniors.

with regards to the empty promises part, nt tt it has not happened before. n it occurred precisely during this holiday (before i have a job, yes.)

1. internals during trng camp. i so wanted to go, to look and help to score, but in the end i could've cuz im forced to stay at home due to some housework.
2. team trng last wed. i was down for my 2nd blood test. before knowing bout it, i told jen i'll be going down for their team trng.

and i fear more of these would happen.

im not finding excuses, i do really want to help out. i was just trying to let out some of my v compressed feelings within me.

for now i shouldn't be slacking and waiting for the job to come. and to clear watever i have at hand now.

1. send resumes to more firms, to increase chances of getting recruited. one is to start earning money quick for woman to get the pawned stuffs back, second is to get my schedule fixed so tt i'll get v.lee's ass off coaching the pistol team soon.
2. prepare the 40+ sets of liners so tt woman would stop screaming my head off to get me to start on them. and to have more time to spare in the future.
3. clear up my table for brother.
4. get the momentum to finish cutting by thursday every week so that i would not have to keep facing a rushed wkend every week.

jiayou to me. hahaha.

wint3rdreamz@4:13 PM
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