Tuesday, December 30, 2008
i shant be fickle minded.
or i'll end up with nth i guess
going by purely my feelings had been so much easier when i was younger.
now no longer.
im beginning to lose faith with him. i duno wat he wants. perhaps just frens after all?
but part of me was telling me i mite have appeared to be pushing him away, by telling him those 'troubles' of mine recently.
but whee thk god i have nv been so happily bz in my whole life before like now
cuz things like studies are no longer part of the busy-ness, period.
it's the thing bout having 1 full time temp job and 2 part time perm jobs:
admin, lifeguard n co/ro
and oh one more, at home! lol -.-
lol. how can i be described as "You represent one of the brightest of your cohort"
when none of my prelim scores hit above 50 percentile?
every rejection's painful for me, for ya.
tt last word u said;
and are u trying to tell me we cant even be frens anymore.
wint3rdreamz@12:14 AM
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Friday, December 26, 2008
yst was a (fill in the blank) day for me.
guilty, heart wrenching, confused, watever.
i have nv been 'dk-ed' in my life, till yst.
spent 10h doing lg during xmas. woah great isnt it
做/坐 dao sian lol
hahaha
n i just realised i only did 3 times of lg,
but i realised i learnt alot there.
i get to meet ppl tt i dun get to meet in sch
ppl from ite, poly, working adults with tons of life experience
made a few frens at admin too.
mostly are temps, and are kinda cute girls
nt the looks im talking bout haha
life's bz for now, but duo zi duo cai at the same time. haha
wint3rdreamz@8:02 PM
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Tuesday, December 23, 2008
we shall wait and see.
im confident, but not SO confident as yet
im really curious to see, just to see how long this kinda frenship can last.
hahaha im experimenting with my life again. lol.
wint3rdreamz@12:34 AM
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Sunday, December 21, 2008
weird thing.
boys can just talk bout f-ing girls so openly
but they r actually virgins with little dating experiences.
talk big only eh? trying to sound cool?
haha one advice for guys: better get a gf in jc or poly. otherwise there wun be any chance to get to know girls in the future anymore. (maybe not so much for jc ones cuz they still can noe girls in uni)
imh xmas party and lg duty yst
first time at imh, interesting experience. though i wasnt tt enthu then, partially cuz of my 'morning sickness' lol
the programme, though short, was fun. hope they had a great morning :)
got to noe new ppl during duty agn
the usually men's talk i had to 'endure'. haha not really endure but just listen lol
and got abit help on how to settle tt online guy.
haha..cuz one of the guys do this kinda thing too.lol...
but they r harmless really...just abit erm...desperate? haha
unclelawrence's leaving soon :(
for his own progress thus shall be happy for him.
and it's quite pressurising and yet touching when he just told his staff tt
"she's not going to stay here. she will become a someone in the future"
need shades. and it's gonna be so ex
and formal shoes and more formal clothing.
i duno whether im earning money or spending more. lol >.<
wint3rdreamz@2:47 PM
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Thursday, December 18, 2008
admin work's kinda slow paced..or izit cuz im only the assistant tt's y.
haha
but i kinda dun dare to slack in front of my supervisor though i have absolutely nth left to do for the last half an hour today.
lol
8.80 buffet can u believe it!
saw it on tv just now...waffle buffet haha
d24 durian waffle, cheese waffle, etc...
and last but not least oreo bits waffle!
cravingggg
heh
wint3rdreamz@8:48 PM
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Wednesday, December 17, 2008
these few days past like a bad rollar coaster ride. Labels: music
bad in the good sense, yet too extreme for my weak heart. hahaha.
relieved, guilt-stricken, worried, disappointed, relaxed, glad, excited.
watever.
i think the mass of my heart fell by alot. it felt so much lighter aft saying all the things i die oso wun say.
i just got a job. like suddenly. in the morning the person called and asked if i m ready to work tmr anot. like woah, no interview or anything.
den just went down to the office then signed some contract.
yay
刘力扬-眼泪笑了
我眼泪都笑了 谁还想哭呢
再勇敢的站着 找回光和热
面对你的时候 我不会舍不得
因为你已是过客 因为路有些曲折是美的
nice song. v encouraging indeed. but not sth i would need now thou. haha.
wint3rdreamz@4:33 PM
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Tuesday, December 16, 2008
thank you and sorry, my old lover boy
was great chatting our hearts out today.
and now i can move on, with u on my mind, but not the love feeling kind.
----
and to csb,
sorry a thousand times over.
like really.
im such an ass i cant believe i just played along lidat.
i cant believe that i can be such an ass myself.
damn wat's wrong with me
wint3rdreamz@5:43 PM
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Monday, December 15, 2008
You Are An ESTJ
The Guardian
You're a natural leader and a quick, logical decision maker.
Goals are important in your life, and you take many steps to achieve them.
You enjoy interacting with others, mostly through work related activities.
Your high energy level means that you are great at getting things done!
In love, you tend to bring stability to relationships.
You feel comfortable being in charge, and you enjoy being a provider.
At work, you take charge. You thrive in structured environments and don't mind enforcing the rules.
You would make a great teacher, judge, or police detective.
How you see yourself: Realistic, stable, and pragmatic
When other people don't get you, they see you as: Rigid, bound to rules, and a bad listener
i think i've changed. hahaha
wint3rdreamz@5:49 PM
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my hesitant attitude causes trouble.
every now and then
if i would have been more firm about helping out with the pistol team, perhaps he wun even have the chance to come into the picture.
"...n eh i duno if it's nice for them to stop him from going down since they hav alrdy accepted his offer.."
"...n nt tt i want him to coach, just tt i dun want to make empty promises, get him out but in e end unable to commit to them n den they'll be left w no one..im nt sure if i'll be able to look aft them if i get a job..i really dunno"
2 msgs i have sent to e.dad regarding the issue. such a weakling arent i.
i wun say im more capable than v.lee. but at least im sure i'll be more driven to ensure that they do well, being part of team nj and senior of these lovely juniors.
with regards to the empty promises part, nt tt it has not happened before. n it occurred precisely during this holiday (before i have a job, yes.)
1. internals during trng camp. i so wanted to go, to look and help to score, but in the end i could've cuz im forced to stay at home due to some housework.
2. team trng last wed. i was down for my 2nd blood test. before knowing bout it, i told jen i'll be going down for their team trng.
and i fear more of these would happen.
im not finding excuses, i do really want to help out. i was just trying to let out some of my v compressed feelings within me.
for now i shouldn't be slacking and waiting for the job to come. and to clear watever i have at hand now.
1. send resumes to more firms, to increase chances of getting recruited. one is to start earning money quick for woman to get the pawned stuffs back, second is to get my schedule fixed so tt i'll get v.lee's ass off coaching the pistol team soon.
2. prepare the 40+ sets of liners so tt woman would stop screaming my head off to get me to start on them. and to have more time to spare in the future.
3. clear up my table for brother.
4. get the momentum to finish cutting by thursday every week so that i would not have to keep facing a rushed wkend every week.
jiayou to me. hahaha.
wint3rdreamz@4:13 PM
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Saturday, December 13, 2008
nyt monthly DEC Labels: comp
87 89 90 89 355
aww. bad score, but a good enough start :)
i'll never take a break from shooting again. it's bad for my confidence, as shown by this shoot.
i was not focused, i doubted my actions, i change ways to shoot now and then throughout the shoot, i dun trust the new aiming techniques recommended by fan a few days ago.
and when i thought a certain way was alright, i repeated. when it wasnt, i changed immediately.
coach asked me to be satisfied with a 9 for this shoot. i followed, but hitting even 4 nines in a row is exasperating for me. i was miserable.
i had little 10s, more 7s than usual.
" are you going to start 25m? since for now you do not need to study, you can spend more time to start a new event. "
" i want to stabilise my 10m first. how can i expect myself to cope with 25m when i cannot even shoot well for 10? "
" i'll go when i get into ntt, if i can. "
vballed with ailin, b.dad, jo and nicole yst
fun fun and fun. the sun was not too glaring and the air was cooling.
ran Alot. b.dad and ailin would noe y :p
played cards, ate at the top of vivo while chatting.
jo was secretly happy. cuz she made us happy, esp nicole. hahaha
have not seen her suan so much before :l
yay. woman, fan and csb reckoned im thinner now. :D
i think this is for real this time. i felt sparks when ur hand met mine.
wint3rdreamz@8:49 PM
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Tuesday, December 09, 2008
woots back back to close to normal standard
**rmb to lock wrist arhhh**
"you still coming back to shoot arh, but so slack"
"i dun nid to train for nationals liao wat"
"then what are u training for?"
*grabs my heart* "for my passion~~"
haha, i noe wat im training for, (besides passion of cuz)
but im nt gonna say anything till the results show.
guorong's nick today:
to the world, you may be one person. But to me, you are the world
that quote. nostalgia sia :D
when m i gonna c u agn?
wint3rdreamz@8:16 PM
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Monday, December 08, 2008
Labels: music
Your voice was the soundtrack of my summer
Do you know you're unlike any other?
You'll always be my thunder, and I said
Your eyes are the brightest of all the colors
I don't wanna ever love another
You'll always be my thunder
So bring on the rain
And bring on the thunder
wint3rdreamz@8:18 PM
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long post today. consequence for having a packed week and laziness to blog Xl
last sunday
had a haircut, trim, highlight and straightening at 3rd aunt's
a close to 100 bucks worth of treatment for free!
thx aunt :)
ailin came when i started on it for not long
so she was like waiting for me for like 1h+
lol paiseh paiseh....
but nevertheless we chatted and joked and everything.
monday
PROM!
haha...went to find feli in the morning for camera
yea really thankful...for being willing to lend me such expensive stuff and trust me w it
which allowed me to take many many pics
hahaha :D
stoned and slacked in the afternoon
mom din go to work today. so both of us went out to np for a walk.
kinda hurried home to prepare for the nite
haha gt her to help me with the makeup cuz im totally noob in this (like i would ever do tt unless it's necessary)
den went to mrt n met b.dad on the train
haha the nite was quite fun
the programmes were quite good except tt cuz we r sitting at the front the speakers are kinda too loud for our liking.
the host was interesting n funny, though some of the parts r abit diao. heh.
somehow the food din become my main concern tt nite. not only tt it does not taste soo excellent, but oso everyone was bz running ard and taking pics. haha
like group pics more than anything else =D
SHOOTERS~
07S15 :)
nth much for post prom, cuz everyone's like hurrying home :(
took b.dad's fren's van back.
really paiseh for not telling his dad where i lived in the first place, he's really nice n insisted on fetching me to my block instead of dropping me at woodlands. den in the end it resulted in him wasting petrol to go frm woodlands to yishun den back to woodlands.
sorry and thx!
tuesday and wednesday
oO training in the morning
last session of dry firing.
was intending to stop in an hour cuz dun wan to go to chalet too late
but eunice tempted me to fire XD
so fired like 10 shots
the feeling was shuangggg when i triggered tt 1st shot..hahaha
went for chalet aft tt
was lazy to go with the girls to buy stuffs
so headed to the chalet instead and played ball
den it rained heavily. i like i like, but only stayed in the rain for awhile due to the thunder Xl
bbq
nice corn, nice sotong and nice mashmallows w nutella (cuz i make one :p)
laughs at the mix ups the girls had with sotong, octopus and jellyfish, esp xinhang haha.
and the not-so-funny jokes lol.
poker and asshole daidi
watched senior farewell video with the boys and then with apg
aft which was present-giving.
the girls were playing some sort of like deal or no deal with ailin and i
so we were supposed to have our backs turned and guess who had our respective presents
if we guessed wrongly, we would be whacked by them
haha bet they had been waiting for this, for they whacked without mercy when we guessed wrongly...lol.
and then... tada...
:DD
really m touched by all these they have done (video, drawing, pillow and card)
thx lots lots... <333
gandongs leh :)
then was nite cycling
was helping to teach verene to cycle with wuduo and mingjie
and she was able to come w us to cycle in the park :D
din cycle for v long though
back to slack
then cycled agn, on my own
chionged all the way ard the park this time
shiok :)
watched abit of mahjong playing and we went to find sunrise. lol
din managed to though.
think e other time when i caught sunrise at costa sands was in july
but now the sun rise in the other way of the east cuz it's like dec now :(
stayed ard and took pics though.
back and showered and slept for like only 2h
lunch and then down to yck pool for lifeguard duty from 2.30pm to 9pm.
was getting as much slp as possible on the way there so i wun like eh...slp during duty >.<
first time there. coach lawrence was transferred there from yishun pool due to some probs with the previous lifeguard at yck (politics lol)
so i guess im gonna to be stuck there for duties.
think it's nicer than yishun pool though.
duty was ok. thkfully nth happened.
full timers desmond and terence are interesting n v nice ppl to talk to.
kinda great cuz it kinda shortened my supposedly boring 6h (though it still felt as though time has slowed down >.<)
haha and they agreed on the same thing (including uncle lawrence): part timer is a slack job as u get paid for just sitting down there, lol.
but with great responsibility and alertness as well.
home and slppppppppp :D
thursday
went for physiotherapy thingy w b.dad at changi hospital
okayy was quite interesting n stuff (given tt i learnt alot more bout tt department)
but im actually in fact more interested in sports sci than physio, haha.
friday
trained in the morning
finally can let off some gas n spit some pellets during training liao
haha
expected, e shots r like sht.
9s and 10s are there...but strayed worse than ever
like...i tot my bad shot would be a stray to high 8 but it ended up at low 7
lol.
this sat's gonna be monthly and im so nt prepared for it >.<
went bowling with nisha n praba aft tt.
haha stupid me went all the way down to marina bay mrt cuz i tot marina sq's at marina bay. lol
only realised it's at city hall aft calling praba. haha
bowled for 3 rounds.
quite ok, scored more than 90 for 2 of the rounds.
shant mention wat was the score for the lousiest round Xl
then had chocolate at gloria jean's
wheee promotion $3 for choco ice blended :)
chatted bout uni n stuff
melbourne? or nus?
depends on my grades and just as imptly: money.
saturday was spent on work
cut cut cut
yesterday
cut somemore. lol.
swam at nite (for the sake of my alrdy darkening skin yea)
took timings this time, n it's frigging lousy >.<
breaststroke: 1.13
free: 1.23
side: 1.29
dun ask me why my freestyle's slower. perhaps i dun have enough stamina to chiong for the whole lap Xl
haha timings lidat....think ppl would laugh at me if i were to tell them im a lifeguard.
lol
must train n train more...!
today was spent doing duno wat
work up very very late (due to the sweet sweet rain) and so today past kinda fast.
uncle and his family has been staying at my house in the day for the past 3 days
my lil cousins r cute and troublesome man
haha had fun playing with em at times,
but they can really screw up the house like sht
lol.
wahseh spent like 2h plus blogging!
partly cuz blogger screwed up my part of my post when i added pics aft the words :(
wint3rdreamz@3:45 PM
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Friday, December 05, 2008
im starting to give in
im missing u
but somehow, there is someone u cant let go.
and all i can for now, is to wait....
=)
wint3rdreamz@12:18 AM
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Wednesday, December 03, 2008
wat happened these few days..
prom
training
shooting club chalet
lifeguard at yck pool
post another day bout these.
oya oya, was emo-ing this morning
and realised tt slping can really make me feel much better and more rational
or was i too forgiving to myself?
so whenever i feel emo, must go and take a nap of sth.
whee napping rocks.
and i really need to slp now, damm tired.
ps: i've got a new damm nice pillow to hug onto tonight! apg <333
wint3rdreamz@11:56 PM
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